The Epic Visit to the Pediatrician

This morning was enough to tire me and embarrass me for some time.

Months ago, I scheduled Lorelai's 3 yr check up on 12/5 and Adalaide's 9 m check up on 12/13. I had to rearrange things after I scheduled Phoebe's eye appt for 12/5...which then later changed to 11/25, but before she got in early, I made both girls an appointment at the pediatrician for 12/13. I thought it would be better to get them both checked at the same time.

I laugh at myself now.

Since about Wednesday I have been telling Lorelai about our Friday plans and what to expect. She has been to most of Addy's appts before so I thought she would be uncomfortable but reluctantly cooperative. Boy, was I wrong.
The nurse called us back to a room and stopped us in the hall to get LEL's height and weight first. All it took was "Can you take off your coat and boots so we can see how much you've grown?"
Lorelai said "no" sternly, then adamantly refused to do anything the nice nurse asked. No amount of distraction, bribes, begging, or reverse psychology made any deference. This is where LEL's self-assurance and independence come to be a huge pain in the neck.
She would not stand to be measured, nor would she step on the scale. She was crying in the hall, making things unnecessarily difficult.
Addy went first. She loved it, especially the whole sit naked on the scale part.

"Look Lorelai! Addy thinks this is fun, don't you want to try?"

"NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!" followed by some incoherent screams and pouting.
*I'm not exaggerating.

Well, after about 10 more minutes (though it felt like forever) we decided muscle was the only way we were going to get those stats.
A nice nurse held a happy Addy baby while I helped two other nurses pick up my screaming 3 yr old off the floor, and pin her to the infant measuring table to get our best height mark. Then, I had to get weighed myself (yay.) then pick up and hold Lorelai and get weighed again. You, know, subtract the two, and you get our best effort on her weight.
They never did get her bp.

Keep in mind, we had not even seen the Dr. yet.

Adalaide's examination was first. She is just fine except for her weight. She is in the 3%. That's right, 3. So, they want me to get more calories into her by heavier formula and by adding in vegetable oil to her foods. Sounds kind of gross, but hey, whatever they want me to try, I will.

Lorelai did slightly better with her examination. She liked the Dr. better because the only thing he asked her was the only thing she wanted. "Do you want to sit with your mom for a minute?" She got to climb up on the table and sit with me while Addy tried to climb the wall behind us. Lorelai is just fine too. She's still tall and lean. She will need to see a pediatric dentist soon (that should be like one of the worst days ever), and after talking to the Dr. about her speech he told me to sign her up for some speech therapy at a nearby elementary school. It wasn't until a little later did LEL warm up a bit and start talking about the Lion King picture on the wall did the Dr. then turn around and say with certainty that we should just have her evaluated. Ergh, was hoping we could escape that, but ok, we will live. I hope...that would involve taking simple instructions from strangers again. Oh my.

Just before we left they needed blood samples for lead and iron levels. Adalaide did great with hers, no crying. Lorelai just about melting down into the floor again...and yet again when she saw the bandaid on her finger. Of course, she ripped it off then panicked when she saw her finger was still bleeding...then the second bandaid didn't seem like such a bad idea. She kept that one on the whole day, and used that hand sparingly, frightened it might start bleeding again.

These are the crazy things I will look back on in years to come with a smile on my face...but we aren't looking back just yet, are we?


M.LEWIS